To experience true accountability, we have both the right and the responsibility to ask each other hard and to-the-point questions. Our goal must be not just to help each other feel good, but to help each other be good. The following questions are only suggestions. You may add and subtract as you wish. The point is not legalism, but checking in with each other in a meaningful way.
Questions to Ask Initially--And Come Back To Periodically
l. What are the biggest barriers to your relationship with God?
2. What are the biggest barriers to your relationship with your wife?
3. What are the most serious temptations you face at home? At work? Elsewhere?
4. If Satan were to wage an all-out attack on your life, what area(s) would he focus on? (What are your greatest points of vulnerability? For example, sexual impurity, financial irresponsibility, dishonesty, greed, pride, etc.)
5. How can your brothers help you and pray for you?
Questions to Ask Each Other Regularly
If there's more than two or three men, not all of the following can be asked of each man each week. Even when asked, the answer may be brief. The point is not to always answer each question but to regularly bring up each area and thereby give opportunity for sharing. Don't let more than a few weeks go by without discussing any of these areas. (You may wish to add questions of your own.)
1. What have you learned or memorized this week from God's Word? (Share a specific passage.)
2. What happened this week that put you to the test? How did you respond?
3. How are you doing in your relationship with God? (Be specific--time in the Word, prayer, sense of dependence on the Lord, etc.)
4. How are you doing in your relationship with your wife? (Be specific--communication, spiritual sharing, conflict resolution, etc.)
5. How are you doing in your relationships with your children? Or parents? Other key people?
6. How are you doing in your relationships at work or school?
7. How are you doing with your thought life? This week did you consistently keep your thoughts and actions pure before God? (If the answer is "yes", ask "Are you lying?")
8. What kind of a ministry did you have this week? Whom did you share Christ with, either directly or indirectly? Or, how did you use your gifts and resources to help the needy?
9. How can the others pray specifically for you this week?
10. Anything else you'd like to share? (questions or issues you're dealing with?)
Randy Alcorn & EPM
